


Stodgy

by Lady_Phenyx



Category: Doctor Who, Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M, Snogging, Spying, implied sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-18
Updated: 2013-06-18
Packaged: 2017-12-15 09:58:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/848206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Phenyx/pseuds/Lady_Phenyx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>England's just a boring, stodgy, dull nation, right? Hungary's suspicious he might not be quite as boring as he acts...if she could only get evidence of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stodgy

“You’re, like, totally kidding me.”

“I’m not!” Hungary protested. “I’d have proof if my stupid camera’s batteries hadn’t gone dead! Don’t you have any, Poland?” 

“Sorry, Hun. Don’t have any on me. Plus, I totally want to believe you, but really? England? He’s so totally boring,” Poland protested, twisting a strand of hair around a perfectly manicured finger.

“France said he was a pirate…” Hungary mused, “…and he calls him the ‘erotic ambassador of the world’…” Both turned to look at England, who was quietly drinking a cup of tea and ignoring the rest of the nations with the ease of long practice.

“…I’m sorry, but I just can’t see it. I mean, it’s _England_ ,” Poland said finally. “He’s just so…so…” 

They looked at him again, stodgy, boring England, in his stodgy brown suit, messy hair and thick eyebrows, repressed and cranky and dull.

Hungary sighed. “France wouldn’t lie that much, right? Maybe he was a pirate…and I could have sworn he was dressed like one this morning…” She couldn’t have dreamed up that red coat, could she? She’d never seen England wear red before…

Germany stood to call the meeting to some semblance of order, and Poland patted Hungary on the shoulder sympathetically. She sighed again and detoured to borrow some new camera batteries off Japan before sitting down.

 

A few hours into the meeting, and Hungary was watching England out of sheer boredom. Maybe Poland was right, maybe England was just a stodgy, boring old nation…but those arguments with France…and she could have _sworn_ she’d seen him swaggering into the hotel that morning in full pirate regalia, smirking and smelling of the sea…

A strange noise from outside cut off her thoughts, a loud grinding, whining that faded in and out. For a moment she thought she was imagining it since no one else seemed to notice it…except England, who perked up and politely excused himself before making a quick exit. Without being quite sure why, she grabbed her camera and followed him through the hotel’s corridors and out the back door.

 

“Hey,” England said, and Hungary froze, ducking behind a wall and peering out after the nation, relieved to see he was still turned from her. “You think you’re leaving without even saying goodbye?”

The thin man standing outside a blue police box – where had that come from, Hungary wondered momentarily before focusing – spun to face the shorter man. 

“I didn’t even get a chance to say ‘thank you’,” England continued, stalking towards the other man, who shrugged, grinning.

“Well, there’s never really been a question of that between us,” the other man said, eyes going soft as he stared down at the nation in front of him. “After all…”

England cut him off, grabbing the front of the man’s shirt and yanking him down into a kiss. Hungary gasped and nearly dropped her camera, fumbling with it as she hurried to switch over to video and start taping the moment in front of her. Unknowing of his audience, England was apparently determined to kiss the man senseless, kissing with desperate hunger. Both had their hands buried in each other’s hair by this point, and both were making tiny, breathy noises of pleasure that went straight through Hungary.

One last squeeze and a press of his body to the other’s and England let go, slowly, drawing back gently. One last kiss, a bare brush of his lips over the other’s, and he smiled, a rare, soft smile that Hungary had never seen on England before.

“Be safe, Doctor.” 

“…Right. Right. So…um…yeah,” the Doctor said, staggering back a little. “I just have to…um…going now…” He turned and took a step, walking directly into the blue police box with a smack. Wordlessly England reached around and opened the door for him, watching silently as the Doctor entered the box. 

The alley was silent for a moment before a soft curse came from inside the box. The Doctor’s arm came shooting back out the door, grabbing a laughing England’s arm and dragging him inside. 

The screeching from earlier began again, and Hungary watched in shock as the box faded out of existence. As she started to stand to investigate, it faded back into sight and she ducked back down into her hiding spot, heart pounding in her ears. 

Easing back out, she watched the door of the police box open and a laughing England stagger out. At the speed of light her camera was recording again, a laughing England rare enough to use precious memory space for. A laughing, disheveled, blatantly shagged half senseless England was worth even more, as he shot the police box a somewhat mocking salute and kiss as it faded out of sight again. 

Still chuckling, England set himself to rights before heading back into the conference center, practically glowing and, to Hungary’s practiced eye, practically wearing a sign - _Just got laid_. 

A slightly manic grin spread over her face as she checked the footage on her camera. Stodgy old England, was it? Just wait until Poland and Japan got a look at this!


End file.
